82

The woman who owned the bookstore was obviously addicted to the Mary Jane, though she undoubtedly thought it didn't show. Her artwork was terrible and it hung in random places, like it was supposed to be a pleasant surprise, but was more unfortunate than that. Books were generally overpriced and hard to browse because of their haphazard stacking. The college students in the eclectic neighborhood thought it was wonderful mainly because they hadn't cultivated any astute judgment yet. What was well thought out was not yet appreciated; rather, if they were told it was "cool" then it was.

81

The fall air was gold and crisp and it carried the eye for miles and miles. Golden sun warmed where it shone while the sharp shadows held the cold promise of frost to come. Evenings were heralded by woodsmoke fires as the light faded and left the summer-lovers surprised still. Willows yellowed, oaks held fast, and maples dressed in bright finery to be waxed and pressed by those who remembered in time.

80

As the barista deftly scooped the remaining foam off her no-foam latte, Margaret listened to the conversation occurring at the table closest. Normally, you couldn't hear anything, but it was eerily quiet. She realized the ever-present, ultra-hip compilation CD wasn't playing. Now that it was gone, she missed it.

"I can't make decisions. It's because of my mother. She never let me decide when I was young. My father worked all the time and I developed an unhealthy attachment to men who would abandon me."

"Mmm," said the man.

"One no-foamsoychailatte?"

"Thank you," she said, abandoning the woman herself as she was sure the man would, too.

Margaret sat at a small, round table near the front windows. Another woman with a lap full of computer sat in one of the upholstered chairs. The woman kept laughing at something she was watching. Eventually, Margaret had the idea that the woman was not laughing at something on the computer, but rather something playing in the woman's own head. The realization made her notice the woman's clothes, which didn't match, and her short haircut, which was uneven and quite possibly self-inflicted.

Her chai was hot, but not overly so. She sipped cautiously to make it last.

79

Sarah wasn't looking forward to working with Merrilee. Despite her name, Merrilee was one of the most miserable people she had ever known. The other performers would take bets on what Merrilee's first complaint would be once she arrived, late, as usual. The most popular were: "It's so early," "The drive in was terrible," "It's hot/cold," "It smells in here." Today, Sarah won the bet with, "I was stuck behind a truck the whole way."

78

Why did I never appreciate my bed the way I should have? Lenora wondered, turning on her other side to help alleviate the pain in her shoulder. Everyone knows the ground is hard, but you don't truly understand what it means until you attempt to sleep on it. Rocks are pointy. Dew is cold. The dark is dark. Unknown noises are scary. Having to pee without a proper bathroom is annoying. I promise to love my next bed. I promise I will thank it every night and every morning.

77

She wasn't the same dog, but she was a good dog. In some ways, she was a better dog, but, again, not the same. Finn still expected her dog to bound to the door. She still had trouble calling the new dog by her name and not by his name. She had trouble thinking of her as "her" and not "him".

But the new dog wagged and wagged her non-existent tail. She whined with joy. She came when you called. She leaned on your legs. She would let herself be pet and pet and pet until she fell over. She was a good dog. Finn missed her dog, but she loved this dog, too.

76

I sat backwards, facing the domed hatchback window, looking at the driver behind us look at me. I was knees to chin sitting where the television would go on the new-to-us entertainment center that only just fit inside my Plymouth Horizon. The man and woman in the Volvo behind us smiled, so I waved and they laughed. As I hugged by shins and tried not to get carsick, I continued to wonder, as I had for days, if buying more furniture with someone I wasn't completely sold on was a good idea.