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Setting: low-end coffee shop, small.

Stage dressing: two round tables, each with two cheap chairs; a coffee bar (black particleboard) and a door frame (black) indicating the back room of the shop.

Characters: silent, surly coffee shop owner (Uri.) Beautiful and aloof woman (Chasmine.) Angry businessman with ex-wife trouble (James.) Comic relief androgynous bag-person with "Hank" the mop head (Limpy.) The characters should be read as written: superficial and without personality or redeemability. When delivering lines, actors should remember the word "snide."

Plot: no discernible plot. James will be angry. Chasmine will be aloof and, eventually, intrigued but untouchable. Uri will pop in and out as the other characters need coffee or have a question. Limpy will ease tensions just in time, but only temporarily. The end of the one-act will leave everyone feeling like nothing happened, life is hopeless and that it must be much more difficult to write plays than one would think.

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He never went to the auditions; the lack of a daughter would be too obvious there. He only ever sat in on rehearsals, watching as the girls improved night after night, though some, invariably, never improved.

He sat right with the other proud dads, but unlike them, he never brought a Tom Clancy novel or the latest issue of Fly Fisherman or even a fancy phone. He watched. His favorite was "A Hard Knock Life," though "You're Never Fully Dressed" came in a close second.

Whenever any theatre company was putting on Annie, Harper was there. Unobtrusive in "dad jeans" and a flannel shirt or slightly worn out weekend polo.

72

ACT I

The living room of a grand country mansion, formerly owned by the recently deceased Lady Underwood and long deceased Lord Underwood. The ornate furniture is covered by dirty white tarpaulins. Some items, including floor lamps, chairs and, at center stage, a sofa, are easily recognizable. The walls, where not covered with dark oak paneling, are wallpapered in an equally dark and stuffy old style.

(Sounds of a key in the front door, stage left. The key does not open the door, and more key sounds follow. Sounds of a large set of keys being dropped. Frustrated noises. More key sounds until, finally, the door is opened by a youngish man, ANDREW SCOTSLEY.)

ANDREW. (Makes a satisfied sound and sets down a small suitcase.) Home sweet home.

(Leaving the front door open, ANDREW strides to a tarpaulin that is covering a floor lamp and pulls violently and without care for the dust. Dust flies everywhere causing ANDREW some breathing trouble.
ANDREW proceeds more cautiously to the covered sofa; however he pulls just as violently, this time turning his head and covering his mouth with his sleeve. Sitting upright in the middle of the sofa is a CORPSE.)

ANDREW. (Laughs triumphantly at thwarting the dusty tarpaulin.) I will have to hire a mai... (Trails off, noticing the corpse.) Woah.